Storytelling and the Sober Life

My story into alcohol addiction began like all addicts. By living in a world

where alcohol is everywhere. There is nothing I can do about that.

But I can learn to control how I respond.

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I think I have always understood there is power in story. Since I was a child, being read too and then reading for myself, I have enjoyed reading books, watching movies, listening to jokes. The laughter, creative imagination and tears, stories  have  enriched my life. IN 1992, At age 44, I began to uncover the power of storytelling in a new more personal way. It started while reading Escaping Intimacy: The Pseudo-Relationship Addictions by Anne Wilson Schaef.  In this book, Schaef explored, what she called “pseudo-relationships”—patterns of relating that look like intimacy, but are actually addictive substitutes for real connection. Just as people can become addicted to substances, she argues, they can also become addicted to unhealthy relationship dynamics that block genuine closeness.*synopsis Chat GpT

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After reading Intimacy, I jumped right into Schaef’s When Society Becomes an Addict. In it she argues that addiction is not limited to alcohol, drugs, or other substances—it is a systemic condition that permeates modern Western society. She proposes that American culture (and other industrialized societies) display the same characteristics as an addicted individual: denial, dishonesty, control issues, obsession with power, dependency, violence, and an inability to confront reality.*synopsis Chat GpT

 

I know, I know, you're probably thinking, "Whew, that's an awful lot of high brow stuff. I think I just sprained my brain."

 

But, that's me. I found my life jumping off the page in a way that shook my very sense of being. A way that sparked a deep sense of anger. Anger at society for being lazy; anger at christianity and other religions for being filled with lies and deceit; with anger at myself for choosing to be unaware and refusing to actually See. Anger that sparked me to act.

 

From time to time over the previous decade, I had been told by well meaning folks, that I was probably an alcoholic. A highly functional one, but an addict all the same. I just ignored them. Even though the evidence, alive in my own family, was clear as a robin shell blue sky on a crisp sunny day.

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In my personal time line, it was late 1992- early 1993. By this time I had been married and divorced twice, was newly engaged and just about to break it off. I already cheating on her. I felt lost. I was seeking answers. Through the storytelling in the Schaef books, I was beginning to understand that I was an addict. More importantly, that there was something I could do to bring some honesty and integrity back into my life.

 

Without giving it a second thought, I used that shaken sense of self to book a Schaef retreat on Finding Real Intimacy.  The retreat was at a hot spring in Montana July 2 -4, 1993. It was s sober event. I finished off a six pack of cheap beer I had in my refrigerator on June 30. I managed to stay sober until the workshop and have remained so since. My sober re-birth day is July 1, 1993. That's over 33 years or 11,763 lived one day at a time days .  14September2025